creating boundless space in our lives

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True love

photo by anantakasainlife

photo by anantakasainlife

We often seek love but never find it. We spend a good chunk of our time searching for the right person and come up empty-handed. We become bitter, disappointed and disillusioned. Why is this? Because what we are seeking is not true love but ephemeral love–a love that is fleeting and temporary. It is here today and gone tomorrow. True love, on the other hand, is within us. It is boundless, limitless, spacious, all-encompassing. It is not something that we find out there but something that we have inside us. It never leaves us and it cannot be taken away. It is, however, covered up by our incessant thoughts and judgments so we can not feel it or know it.

How do we bring out true love within us and in our relationships? The key is to allow ourselves to be who we are and our partners to be who they are. We empty ourselves of our concepts, thoughts and illusions so we are able to give our partners our undivided attention. We look at them without judgment or comment. We create space within the relationship. We then feel our essence and that of our partners and we do what is best for them without wanting anything in return. All the mind games and power plays come to an end and are replaced by a sense of peace and stillness. The paradox is that we find love when we no longer need to seek love.

Eckhart Tolle said it best when he said, “Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God.”


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When we lose something or someone, we feel a hole in the fabric of our existence. We attach our sense of self to people and things so that when these forms leave us (and they will), we lose our identity. We don’t feel enough. We feel abandoned, betrayed, angry, confused, hurt, depressed, anxious. We struggle to cover up the hole by finding another person or thing to replace the person or object that we lost. But when the new person’s flaws come out or the thing no longer satisfies us, we feel the same kind of frustration that we felt before. And what’s more, we blame them for failing to make us happy. We are on a perpetual treadmill of chasing after happiness.

How can we free ourselves from this vicious cycle ? The key is to surrender–to accept the things that happen to us without creating a story. We don’t resist what happens; we let it happen. We allow the pain and suffering to move through our body without the painful story associated with it.  We break the link between our thoughts and emotions. We reduce the situation to nothingness so we are no longer bound to it. We are then able to let go of the story and the person or thing, and  feel the deep sense of peace and inner joy inside us. We become spacious inside.

We realize that when something bad happens to us, the universe is creating a hole so it can thread through it the strands that bind us all and make us one with the totality. It strips us of our illusions and our ego, so we have nothing, like the rest of creation. It is during these moments of spaciousness that God comes in with His all-embracing love, takes care of us and connects us with every being so we experience the fullness of life.

When we reach this stage, all things come to us with no effort or struggle. Henry David Thoreau said it best when he stated, “Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.”



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The Rainmaker

When we see nature after a rainfall, we see beauty and abundance everywhere. It is a wonderful experience to smell the flowers and shrubs, to listen to the birds singing, to see butterflies darting here and there, and maybe occasionally see a rainbow in the distance. It seems like the earth is fresh and alive after taking a shower.

Why does it rain? As we know, rain occurs when the air is saturated and water vapors in the clouds get too heavy and fall into the earth in the form of rain. There is something we can learn here. When a person is full of good deeds that overflow and touch the people and situations around him/her (ie this person is “heavy” with goodness), the world will shower this person with abundance and blessings. He/she is called  a “rainmaker”.

Most of us only put a minimum of effort into what we do and expect a lot of reward  and recognition in return. Everything we do is geared to gain other people’s attention and admiration. Half of our attention is focused on what we do and the other half on what we will get out of it. Our actions are limited, inferior and mediocre and often get the opposite results.  But when we let go of our expectations and instead focus on the action itself, we experience the beauty of the present moment. We feel our aliveness and the essence of all beings around us. Our actions are done with great care and attention and benefit everyone. Why is this? Because the universe is working through us. We become one with the totality. We are able to bring forth joy, abundance, beauty, goodness and everything else that is needed. Over time, we become “rainmakers”.




When we are in the middle of a dilemma, our mind jumps from one scenario to another. We go around in circles, frantically looking for a solution. We spend sleepless nights replaying stories and incidents in our head. We ruin our health and state of mind over something that has not happened (the future) or something that had already happened (the past).  Both of which are outside our control. This need to bend situations and people to our will has caused diseases, stress, nervous breakdowns, even death.

How much easier it would be to leave life as it is and enjoy the present moment. This moment right now is simple. But concealed in it is a powerful force that is flowing, spacious, all-encompassing, all-knowing. When we allow this moment as it is, we create space within ourselves and allow this life force to work and live through us. We are no longer bound by the spectrum of polar opposites (good/bad, happiness/unhappiness, high/low) so we go beyond our mind’s limited perspective.  We cease identifying with the stories in our head and become aware of the space within and around us. The negative energy that was swirling around the situation dissipates into space, leaving us with a fresh perspective. We feel our own essence as well as the essence of every being that we meet and are able to connect with them. The solution, the answer, the right action, bubbles to surface when we are friendly with the present moment.

The seriousness of the dilemma is recognized as false because we move from superficial reality (which is harsh) to genuine reality (which is benevolent).  We realize that forms are fleeting and ephemeral–they are here today and gone tomorrow–and that no matter how good or bad the situation is, it too will change. We anchor ourselves to the formless life force and experience the peace that is beyond all understanding. As Eckhart Tolle said, “Nothing real is threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God.”

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When we look around us we see problems everywhere. A sister’s marriage is ending in divorce. We lost our job and will likely lose our house. Creditors are hounding us for money. Our kid dropped out of college. A favorite aunt is dying of cancer. The list goes on and on. We try to fix the problem and do everything we can to make things right. We spend sleepless nights trying to find a way out of our dilemma. We hatch various schemes to make things better. But we find out that once a problem is fixed, another pops up in its place. We are in a constant need of chasing the next moment because we believe it will make us happy and fulfilled. This brings us to despair because it seems that nothing we do is ever enough.

The way out of this state of unhappiness is to allow the pain to be there and not run away from it or blame others for it. We realize that we don’t have the power to unfold our life. That power lies in the universe. So we surrender to the pain, stress, drama, worry, or anxiety. We feel the energy that moves through our body and understand that the pain that we feel is humanity’s pain that goes back thousands of years ago. It is not personal and it is not us. We de-personalize the pain and allow it to leave our body. We then feel the stillness within, which is our true self. This self is one with everything and everyone, and is untouched by what happened to us in the past. It travels through space and connects us with the right person, action, or event such that the results are much better than what we could possibly imagine, envision, or visualize. Through surrender, we welcome a new state of consciousness that is beyond our limited mind.

Remember this: when we let go of our impossible expectations and let life unfold, life will take care of us.

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When water flows continuously, it is fresh and invigorating. It gives sustenance to all living things. When it stops flowing, it becomes stale and stagnant. Various objects get trapped in it so it becomes murky, even toxic. The same is true with our body’s energy. When it is able to move freely within our body (whether it is joy, happiness, anger, sadness, etc), it refreshes and invigorates us. But when we hold on to it by identifying with it and adding stories to it, it becomes pain that is trapped within our body. We become entangled with the story, the stress, the drama. We impose our rigid expectations on people and situations. This rigidity cuts us off from the life force of the universe.  Our body becomes brittle and weak due to the constant onslaught of pain.

The way out of pain is to observe it without any judgment. We allow it to be there so we are not reinforcing its energy. We surrender to it and feel it dissipate and flow out of our body. This makes room for the energy of the universe to flow in. We open ourselves to life and let it work through us. We are able to feel the invigorating energy that refreshes every cell of the body. This force also operates outside us so we feel connected with other beings that meet. We feel their true essence and are able to relate to them in a genuine way.  We become alert, present, flexible. Out of this state of awareness comes the answer, the solution, the right action.

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Stories have a beginning, middle, and an ending. They are composed of words that paint a picture or create an image in our mind. It is our way of understanding or coping with the various situations in our life. However, life is more than just the forms or images that occur. It is also the vast space that surrounds us and the place in which things happen. This space is abundant, flowing, dynamic, all-knowing, all-loving. It is limitless and infinite, whereas forms are limited and finite. We can only truly feel space once we let go of forms.

If we don’t have space within, we identify with the fleeting forms that pass through our existence (whether it is a person, thing, or thought) and become entangled with them. We are drawn in by the tears, frustration, stress, sadness or drama.  These are states of being that pass through our existence but we cling to them and replay them in our mind again and again. We cut ourselves off from the flow of life and become stale, unhappy, stressed, disgruntled, or depressed.

The way to break free from this affliction is to allow things, good or bad, to happen without interference. We align ourselves with the present moment.  We don’t create stories to understand what is happening because we know that life has no beginning and no ending. It is constantly changing. Things were meant to happen otherwise they would not have happened. We let the universe play with forms so we can see the magnificence of space. We are content with our pure, true self—that which is stripped of the countless, ephemeral forms. We realize that we are already rich, full, and abundant inside so we don’t need the forms to complete us. We become free.