creating boundless space in our lives

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Everything that happens, good or bad, is interwoven into the fabric of our existence.  One polar opposite can not exist without the other. The tapestry of life is colorful, beautiful, and powerful. It cannot exist on one single thread but needs other myriad threads to be whole.

Our mistake lies in wanting only one side  (good things) and avoiding the other (bad things). We lose our balance because  our attention is focused on a tiny aspect of life, not on life itself. There is balance everywhere if we only open ourselves to this truth.

The key is to allow things and people to be as they are. This lets us go deeper into awareness so we lose our rigid concepts. We step out of our mind and see things from a higher perspective. We realize that everything, good or bad, was meant to be. We learn that reality is whole and indivisible and can not be otherwise. Everything has its place and purpose in the vastness of the universe. We then become open to life so life lives through us and brings us to the perfect moment.


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Photo by S. M.

When we are in a state of awareness, we detach ourselves from the situation. We become an observer. We watch things as if it were happening to somebody else. We get out of our rigid concepts and feel the balance that is in everything.

We know that everything has a purpose and we go with the flow of life. Labels no longer bother us. The polarities (good/bad, happiness/unhappiness) cease to affect us.

We see things from a higher perspective. We then stop trying to change people and situations. The strange thing is that once we give up our need to change something or someone, change happens effortlessly. Why? Because we stepped outside our ego and allowed space to come into our lives. It is this space–where polarities don’t exist–that brings about the change. We are then able to experience life to its fullest.

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It is nice to stay out in the yard on a warm summer day to watch nature at work. The birds are chirping happily on the trees. The sky is clear and blue.  The daisies and sunflowers are swaying in the breeze. Here and there, we see butterflies dart from flower to flower. We marvel at these beautiful, colorful insects that add beauty to the scenery.

As we know, a caterpillar undergoes a painful transformation in which it loses its old self and develops wings, legs, eyes, and other body parts to become a beautiful butterfly. There is something we can learn here. Like the butterfly, we can watch the pain that comes into our lives without becoming entangled with it. We watch the loss or suffering without any judgment or thinking. We leave things as they are so life can work its magic. We don’t add emotions or stories to events because we know that there is nothing we can add to the situation that will make it better. It is already fine the way it is. In short, we shed our old state of consciousness to make way for a new, enlightened state of awareness. This complete surrender puts our mind at ease. We then see the pain as just a flow of energy that passes through our being–nothing more. We become one with the situation. Out of this state of presence comes the solution, creativity, intuition, or right action. We discover the beauty that was hiding in the form and experience the blessings of life.

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We live in a world that thrives on judging things, people, or situations. As soon as something is observed, it is categorized and judged as one or the other–good/bad, positive/negative, happiness/unhappiness. Our sense of self is attached to our positions and beliefs and then when things change or loss occurs (a spouse leaves, a child moves away, a friend dies), we feel confused, frustrated and in despair. There is a hole in the fabric of our being and we try to fix it or mend it as soon as we can. We don’t leave things as they are, so we become entangled with the forms of life.

We can disentangle from form by watching things unfold before our eyes without fixing or judging them. We allow people and situations to be as they are. We don’t impose our views on them, so we are able to accommodate different perspectives. We become aware of a vast field of spaciousness that embraces everything, and realize that forms comprise a tiny fraction of it. Even if forms change and fluctuate, space will always be there to absorb the destruction of form so new forms can arise. Things then lose their heaviness and intensity, and we see the goodness, the essence of life in everything and everyone. Instead of being separate from life, we become one with life.

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Dropping the ball

Oftentimes we let other people’s comments and thoughts affect our lives. A friend throws a a look or comment our way and we give him/her our response (positive or negative). It is like hitting a ball that the other throws at us. For example: you are enjoying your day when a friend calls to tell you that she was dumped by her spouse/significant other. You suddenly feel your spirits take a dive. You want to protect her from the pain and unhappiness caused by the breakup so you tell her that things will get better and she will find somebody else. That other guy was a jerk who didn’t deserve her. You are now making stories to cover up the pain, which adds another layer of unhappiness on top of the layer of suffering that she is experiencing.  In other words, when your friend threw the ball of despair to you, you responded by hitting the ball back so the cycle of despair continues.

Instead of perpetuating despair, why not try something different? Why not let your friend feel the pain without making up stories? Just let her experience the pain, suffering, and despair that she feels at that moment without inserting your thoughts and opinions. There may be a lot of crying and blaming but just observe what is happening. You are giving your friend space. You are dropping the ball. You are letting the formless (universe) flow into the form (situation) so that things lose their harshness and become gentle and benevolent. The pain just becomes an energy movement that is experienced against the background of space that surrounds it. Healing happens this way. There is an intelligence and wisdom in each situation (no matter how bad) that is hiding and will only show its face once you let things be. Remember this: the universe loves you and cares for you but you have to give it space to do its work.

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Dealing with death

Most people shrink away from death. They live in constant fear of it and try to run away from it. Some people even deny its existence. But if we realize that death is an opening into another dimension, then death loses its grip on our lives. We are not denying death but simply acknowledging its existence. Death is as natural as life. It is good or it would not be. Others talk about life and death as if these two are opposites. But as Eckhart Tolle puts it, the opposite of death is birth. Life is eternal. Death is the loss of form so that a new form can arise. Life is rearranging itself even in the presence of death. We have to let things happen so that we can experience the full spectrum of life–from birth to marriage to retirement to death–and to see the magnificence and beauty of God in every situation.

This posting is dedicated to a dear friend, Mark Boggs, who passed away suddenly on May 12, 2011. This one’s for you, buddy.

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Emptiness as a way of life

Emptiness sounds like a terrifying thought to many but it is actually liberating. When you are no longer attached to form, the formless (or unmanifested or whatever you want to call it) comes into your life and fills it with unlimited possibilities. It is like a new road has been opened for you and all you have to do is follow the road. You trust the universe to take care of you and guide you along life’s journey. You no longer think of life as hard and difficult. It just is. When you reach this point, you will no longer be disturbed by the constant flux of things. You may even play with forms and enjoy them for a change!